Tuesday, January 18, 2011


Still alive everyone; just dealing with some new medical issues for Wash and myself.

I am beyond stressed and angry and frustrated these days. Dealing with our insurance and trying to get some-any-benefits right now is just draining me. I love getting to the point where I have to go "Co-pays/non-insured medication or gas and car insurance?"


Sample of my day; 66 miles driven so far and this;
One of Wash's (new) doctors says, "Where do you want to see yourself in 3 months?"
Wash, "I would just like to be alive in 8 weeks! I just want to be able to talk about my funeral with my family. I want them to know this is serious..."

Fun times my life. Fun times.

I'll post details later, cause there is nothing like being impoverished to make you open up your life in the off-chance of hope it might do some good. Anyone out there who wants to "adopt" a bill for us?
Here's a very quickly done and basic month for us... the math is quite scary, eh?

Income- $841.00
Food Stamp allocation/month $238.00 (This was just lowered as of Jan 2011- thanks budget cuts!)

Rent $750
Power/heat $70 (winter average) to $300 (summer)
Cable/internet/entertainment $136.00
Mobile (primary) phone $65 (taxes move this by $2-4 per month)
Groceries $350-400 month (Chemo means Wash has to eat certain foods)
Gas and Car insurance (no maintaining counted) $140-180 month
Wash's and my medical co-pays and non-insurance covered medication $400-500 month
Sundries (hygiene items, clothes, cat food, stamps) $50-100 month

So, I'll do the math for you; we take in just over $1000/month in "benefits" and to die living the most basic life with almost no outside entertainment (we have Netflix. We don't "go out" anywhere that's not free) costs at minimum $2041.00

Per month. That's more than a thousand dollar gap to figure out how to close every month. On top of every other worry about Wash I may have.

It could certainly be worse. That's still a metric shitton of stress on not even 25 year old me.
So.... anyone want to "adopt" a bill to pay for us?
Any Santas out there, kind hearted folk, well off and healthy... Robin Hood?

To not leave this off as a really horrid down post, I am happy that my mum will finally get to meet her first grandson (eldest bro's) in March. She's very excited and so am I. I'm recording some videos and books for him to be able to hear our voices too, as I hope to meet him someday too.
He just turned 2. His cheeks are so gorram edible it's envious. Happy thought of the day, a grandma getting to meet her grandkid for the first time. That's pretty special.


  1. Tashi, I want to help. My paypal account was hacked two days ago and it'll be a few days before it will be reauthenticated. I am away from my home state this week and into next but I can get to a bank for a cashier's check or something like that. Email me an address and to whom I can make out the check. My emails get to me at ccassara at **aol ....if you can. Best wishes.

  2. Hi Tashi - I would also like to send a check. knittya@gmail.com

  3. I found my way here, via HeadNurse who was re-tweeted by Roger Ebert. I'm Canadian, and after reading your story I'm thanking my Gods all the more for that. In a usual month, I spend a given dollar amount at Kiva.org, making microfinance loans. For January, half of that budget is going to you two. I wish you the very best possible for your situation.

  4. What sort of cat food/supplies do you use? I'd happily send you litter, kibble, canned food, and some toys Wash can throw for the cat or catnip if it makes your kitty cuddle Wash more. Or if you prefer straight up money, I could do that, too.

    I'd been reading your posts on Jezebel but hadn't realized quite how dire until I saw Head Nurse's post. I'm sorry for waiting so long to offer help other than good thoughts.

  5. I feel you kiddo. Since my car accident I haven't been able to work... money is elusive. Stress is high. If you need someone to call and bitch to, you know my number.

    And every best laid plan to see you has fallen through over the past two years. For realz. I need to hang out with you.

    -Jenn (Madam J. Elizabeth)

  6. I just started reading your blog today though a link that Albino Black Bear put in her blog (Asystole is the Most Stable Rhythm). Thank you for writing about what you and your husband are going through. Your insights and descriptions of your hardships are invaluable for anyone in or entering the medical profession. Financially, I am in a situation right that is a very diluted version of yours (ironically, I just wrote a post in my blog very similar to yours regarding the breakdown of finances and the gaping disparity between income and expenses), but am heading back to work soon. I hope that we can help a little. Your situation has definitely helped me to put my own hardships in perspective.

  7. I don't know if what I was able to give was helpful. I hope it is.