360 days

I don't feel like I am 'coping' or that this existence is 'living'. I do not resent my friends and family for being able to live; to get married and have a wedding, to get pregnant and have a/more child(ren), to have a savings and be able to travel, or go out for a dinner or to a movie...
But I wonder, I wonder if they even stop for a minute every.single.day. and know how lucky they are. Are you truly thankful and can you see all the wonders you have?

My problem is I cannot always let go of the pain at seeing people Live, and knowing that it will never be me.

360 days ago I ceased to be me.

I don't know what I am anymore.