Wednesday, October 31, 2012

TARDoor Returns!

When we first moved into our (my?) current home, pretty much the first thing my husband noticed was our door that was almost the same colour and shape as the TARDIS.

He asked a few times if he could put up a TARDIS sign. We did not have time the first Halloween, we were still moving in.
The second one, we were both in the hospital; I pretty much lived there for the couple weeks Wash was in there.
The third, he started to get back to the TARDoor idea again.

So, we started to turn our door/home into a TARDIS on Halloween. Traditions begin! [Occasionally on Christmas or Boxing Day as well]

He was SO PROUD of how it came out. He spent about 2 hours on the windows alone. Wanted to make sure they were "perfect". The architect in him.

This year, I was planning to just hide out with a good scary movie. We do not get too many kids on our street, and there are none living in the complex currently.

However, as I got on with my day, I started to feel like something more than just Wash was missing.

I did not spend as much time as he did on perfecting the location of everything, but I did my best.
Tonight, I will watch "Blink" and the other Weeping Angels episodes while I paint and wait for any kids to come by. It's also a good night for "Zombieland" and "Hot Fuzz". It's Tim Dalton!
I am still feeling pretty down, between some miscommunications with family members, some well meaning people trying to give me perspective but in a real badly phrased way, and just missing the fuck out of Wash. He loved Halloween. I might post pics of his old costumes tomorrow.
I hate money issues.
I hate having no credit. I hated to have to find money to pay upfront and in full for his cremation and death papers, and I've hated that after 7 weeks I still have not received a cent from the $225.00 Death Benefits I am entitled to as his spouse. Which is not even 1/3 the cost of what I had to pay.
I have tried to let a lot of my anger and hatred go, and to some extent, it has worked. To another, there is still a lot of anger to people who are now no longer in my life at all.

Back to topic. Apologies, Dear Reader, this is my life. Mid thought of anything, and thoughts of Wash or his end will come into my mind. Always.

So I spent a little time today bringing back out the TARDoor.
I don't think/know if we have any Doctor Who fans in the complex, I guess tonight I will find out.
One of the frat brothers who lives close to me is splitting a pumpkin pie with me tonight.
Minutes seem like hours, and then 4 hours will pass in just a few blinks to me.

This is *my* TARDoor. I suppose there is always a chance I might open it tonight and find my TimeLord.


  1. I would love to see some of his costumes, if you're up to sharing any time soon.

  2. I love your TARDoor! Did anyone comment on it? Did you get any ToTers?

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